Tuesday, March 29, 2011

What happens when help is declined

Yesterday after my partner and I presented our 12-min spiel on Protein and its benefits, I looked to her and asked “are you ready for the exam”?  To which she said she knows just about everything possible for the heart.  I reminded her that only 21 of the 50 questions were on the heart section and that 17 were on the respiratory and that was the second priority during my study time. 
And then she had the deer caught in the headlights look on her face and she said “what do you mean respiratory stuff; I thought we weren’t covering that chapter until the next exam”. 
Then I turned my whole body towards her and said (in an Elaine style only seen on Seinfeld kind of way) “SHUT UP, did you not study the respiratory stuff?”  Then her look said it all no, she hadn’t studied the respiratory chapter and yes she was screwed! 
Then in split second, I could see it coming next with her face getting all red, and I said “Don’t cry!”  I looked at the clock and saw that she had little over an hour to cram all that she could into her head about respiratory; I even suggested that we get a small group formed to fill her brain with the needed info.  She chose to go home and watch youtube videos to help her cram during that hour instead.
When she got done with the exam, her score was 68%, not good for her, not good for anyone. 
Now what kind of upsets me is the fact that at the beginning of the last week I went to her house and supplied her with a copy of the exam review and popular possible questions that were suggested to be studied.  I know that I included the respiratory chapter, so now I’m thinking she didn’t even look at that paperwork I gave to her when preparing for this exam, otherwise she would’ve known that respiratory was going to be tested. 
Ugggh, I can’t stand when you try to help someone out and they don’t take your help.  I really feel like she could have done a great job on this test if she would have looked at that paper. 


  1. i wouldn't feel bad for her, especially if you supplied all the necessary info for her. That's her fault for not paying attention! But I can understand your frustration, it drives me nuts when I bend over backwards for someone and they don't recognize it.

  2. That also happens in nursing. :(
    You want and offer to help people, but they decline advice and instead take the suggestions of the "voodoo" medicine that really doesn't do much...all you can do is offer, then the rest is up to that person.

    Frustrating, but real life.

  3. Yikes! Having been in a similar situation with a classmate from my A&P class, all I can say is it was her responsibility to know what material to study and you did more than enough by offering to help.

    I used to send out my self-created exam review sheets to a few classmates that I studied with until I realized that one guy was using only that to study. He would get mad if he missed a question (becasue he did not fully understand the details behind things) and then ask me if my next chapter review could go into more detail. The nerve!

  4. I understand feeling bad for her, because I would too...but at the same time, it's not as if she asked you what was going to be on the exam and you purposely omitted the info about respiratory.

    I think you did what a good partner/classmate would do in that you tried to help...but don't beat yourself up over it :-) And hopefully she'll do better next time!

  5. Thank you all for your helpful words, note to self: be leary of helping others next time because it could backfire! Lol :-)