Is This Normal?

I don’t know if it’s just me but does anyone else get the feeling of jealousy, when they start work and see a co-worker leaving from the shift before them looking excited to leave.  All the while you have a feeling of ‘oh great, another 8, 12 hours ahead of me’ quickly flashes through your mind before you start your shift?  Is this stinking thinking?  Will this pass?  Will I ever go to work excited to work?

Part of the problem is that sometimes as a nurse’s aide you’re not valued in the healthcare field, hence people can throw a lot of work your way or expectations of the “grunt” work.  Keep in mind the job isn’t glamorous or so difficult, but it is hard work!  Every time I go to work I fear my patient load will be too many, or that their acuity level will be too demanding for me to handle on my own.  I fear that I’ll have a handful of isolation patients that will require a lot of my time “gowning up” just to go in and out of their rooms.  Unfortunately other patients aren’t forgiving of the time spent helping all of my other patients.  I don’t like to have co-workers sit and complain or cuss and groan about their jobs because it brings the whole team down.  I don’t like nurses thinking that aide work is beneath them and that they can’t help bring a patient to the toilet.  I especially don’t like our floor being low-census and needing to be pulled to a completely different floor foreign to what I’m used to. 

I’m just wondering if I’ll have the same trials as a nurse, and if by taking out the responsibilities as an aide, will make my job as a nurse any easier or rewarding.  So many times on my way into work I smile at employees just getting off their shift or just coming on, and I’m met with a grunt or no acknowledgement at all.  I don’t want to be that kind of employee that doesn’t find favor in what I am doing.  I want to feel renewed, and refreshed and good inside through my shifts, but as time goes on I’m not sure that is even possible.

I am encouraged when I read the Word and it says in Philippians 4: 10-13, I rejoice greatly in the Lord that at last you have renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it.  I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

Also in Matthew 11: 28-30 where it is written, Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

Amen for God and his reassurances daily even in my discouragements.